epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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