he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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