Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
