Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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