I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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