New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
tequila makes me forget i have legs
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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