Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
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