I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
