Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You're breaking my sexual little heart
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
