dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
