idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
its not stalking. its research.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
