No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
