how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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