Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
