if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
