No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
