Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize