Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize