Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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