I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
