I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
