im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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