Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Randomize
