hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
