yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
