Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
