I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Randomize