Im at strip club and am horny
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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