My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
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