all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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