and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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