Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
