my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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