problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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