i barfeds in our rink
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
