Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
