last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
