come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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