I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
