she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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