How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
