No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize