garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
and i looked up. we had an audience...
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
