do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I want a musical about memes.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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