Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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