He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I need water and some morals
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
