but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
