I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
