We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
