pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
barbara walters just said penis...
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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