We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
that's an acceptable place to lick
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
third nipple confirmed
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
